IT HAPPENS

It's been awhile ... I know, I am not good at keeping up with the goings on of my journey. When there is GOOD news, I would be happy to post, but when there is blah, boring, not exciting news, I don't......this isn't the most horrible of news...... but it happens.

It doesn't matter what kind of diet, exercise or healthy eating habits I do and I lose weight... I go on a bender. It's usually when I am done with a goal. I can say that at least I did my backsliding before my journey is over, so now it is out of my system. 

I did my 8 day detox an loved the weight loss and the way I was feeling. I was to follow up the 8 day with 4 weeks of carb cycling. I started off strong but then wonky work schedules got in my way. I slept when I was used to being away, therefore my eating schedule got messed up as well. As much as I would like to place all of the blame on work, I can not. If I was as dedicated as I thought I was, I would have made myself work out a better system. I didn't have meals prepared for work hours so I would cram a peanut butter and jelly in my face on my way to work. Soda accidentally made it's way back into my system as well... 

OOOPS I DID IT AGAIN.....

With all that being said this happened....

2# gain in a couple of weeks. Could be worse, true but it shouldn't have happened to begin with.  I can find excuses and place the blame on many things. But in all actuality the blame falls on me. There is no denying it.

So my plan now is this: get back to carb cycling, don't let work interfere with my journey, give pop the boot, again, well after I finish this one that is. ;) And I decided that I need to set weight goals or size goals to have something to work for and look forward to, Oh and I definitely will start my walking like I said maybe a million times before.

NO MORE EXCUSES!!!!

Quickie

I have been working a lot so I haven't had much time to update how I have been doing. Let me just say this... When working, unless you are organized and prepared it is hard to stay on track. Also, working in retail as I do, I don't get breaks quite when I need them to keep on track. So when I am home I do my best to stay on schedule and while I am at work, I make for sure I make healthy choices.

I gave in a had a 16oz soda pop today tho and just one little bite of what my Mama had ordered for herself. That was my big NoNo for the day. I can live with that. :) Just going to keep focusing on the right and healthy options.

8 DAYS AND MELT DOWNS

Last Sunday I took my measurements and checked my weight. Not pretty, but it had to be done. Oh and I shared my lovely swimsuit pictures. Since then.....

Down almost 20# and I painted my toenails! :) I did an 8 day detox which was easy, then I had a stressful day so I slipped and had an emotional eating breakdown. Jumped back on the detox train, drink lots (and I mean at least 1 gal a day) of water. So here I am sitting here typing this and wondering if I feel any differently.

The answer is kind of. I know after 20# you would think that you  would feel differently but I only feel different in some spots. Like can you lose weight in your feet? My shoes and flip flops are feeling different. Also, the band on my undies are not as tight! That right there is always a plus! The seat belt in the car isn't as uncomfortable and I am excited to say my rings are loser on my fingers and they move around on their own. :)

Now that I am off of the detox and onto a new eating plan that will go for 4 weeks. I am sure the pounds will come off slower, but they will still be coming off. I should have started physical activity at the start of this, but I didn't. I will be starting soon and that will help kick the pounds off my body.

Here are my measurements for today as well.... Let's keep in mind that I measured myself last week but my husband did it this time. I am going to record the finding here, I will have hubs do it for now on to get more accurate readings. 

Neck  17" ( -.25")
Hips   56.5" ( - 1")
Waist  52.5" (-1.25")
Rt Bicep  18"  (-0")
Lt Bicep  17.5" (+.5")
Rt Thigh  32.75" (-1.25")
Lt Thigh  32" ( -1")
Rt Calf  18.2"  (-1.75")
Lt Calf  17.75" (-1.25")
Chest  56.5" (+1.5")  *Just my luck

And the count down begins in 28 or so days.... Another swimsuit shot! Fingers crossed that a noticeable difference can be seen!!!

LOVING ONESELF

It was brought to my attention that I try to cover up my insecurities with humor. Yes, in fact, I try to make people laugh when talking about myself. It seems to draw attention away from the fact that I am overweight. See right there, I could have made at least a half dozen "funny" comments but I won't. My friend was right. I need to stop with the "funny" because it doesn't build me up. I need positive and I myself am only feeding the negativity. 

So also on this journey I am taking, I will be trying to love myself for all that I am. I may never be stick thin. Actually that is NOT even my goal. I will always be curvy and I need to embrace my curves. Make them work for me. I have always had a bad self image but dammit... "I am beautiful" and eventually I will see that in myself.

Just like losing weight and getting healthy is not going to happen over night, neither is loving myself. I will slip up and put myself down plenty of times, I am sure. I will work hard on stopping that bad habit.

Because truly you can never be loved the way you want to be unless you love yourself.... ME.... Holy Crap, did I just say something profound or was that cheesy as Hell? Ok, I had to put some humor in this piece. 

I want to say Thank You to a great friend Mel. She has the balls to tell it like it is. That is the best thing I love about her. She sent me a message telling me to STOP. So I will, not just because she is right, but because I am sort of afraid of her if I don't! :)

LICKING THE SPOON AND OTHER BAD HABITS

What is your worst eating habit? I have plenty of BAD eating habits, not sure which one is my worst tho. Yesterday I was making a very delicious quadruple layered neapolitan birthday cake with homemade butter cream frosting and chocolate ganache.... I licked the freaking spoon... and the bowl.... and wanted to eat the whole freaking cake. I have been told that you should allow yourself a couple of cheats, but on day 2 of your new eating healthy routine.... NOT GOOD. I gave in, I felt pretty bad but I am over it now.

Who hasn't ever eaten off their child's plate? I am one of those moms that will eat the leftovers because why waste food. I bought my girls a couple kids meals yesterday and they didn't finish. I found myself reaching for the bag. I stopped. I didn't give in. Proud moment.

I was taking my youngest to school yesterday and had a crazy thought... "I already licked the spoon and that burrito I had last weekend was way yummy... why not?!"  I found myself in the Taco Bell parking lot. Thank the stars that the drive through line was very long and I was too lazy to get out to go in. I did not give in.... Proud moment.

Eating way too fast is another bad habit of mine. I could probably eat a 5 course meal in like 10 minutes. As long as I could remember, I have always scarfed down my food. I don't know why, but that needs to stop. I found myself doing it again today with my grilled chicken and broccoli, then I got a bad case of hiccups and I slowed down.

Everyone has bad habit when it comes to eating. I am working on changing mine. Not all will happen all at once, it will take time, just like everything else. I am proud of myself for noticing what needs changing and taking the steps to changing it. And for me to be proud of myself... that's something. :)

BTW.... THIS WAS THIS MORNING!!!!!

down 10# since Sunday Night.... :) I am happy, but not going to get too excited until I redo my measurements on next Monday... that's when I will be able to tell! *fingers crossed*And yes.... I still need someone to come paint my toenails, but maybe I will be able to bend over to do my own in no time! LOL

PEE-A-PALOOZA

So yesterday, I drank a bit more than a gallon of water. It was going well. Yesterday was good actually. Then all of a sudden, Potty break, potty break, potty break. I survived work and only wanted to harm a dozen or so people. It could have been worse.

This morning by 8 I had already had 1/2 gallon of water down. My oldest had a dentist appointment so off into town we went, took her to school and half way there, boy did I have to go. Bumps in the road are sure enhanced when you have an extremely full bladder. I had a few errands to run and then a stop at Walmart. Good Golly, I thought I was going to have to knock a few slow pokes out of my way. I needed to go and they were delaying my trip. My youngest was having a hard time keeping up with me and of course she has to yell "Mama, hurry up so you don't pee yourself". Got to love that kids don't have filters! LOL

I know all this water is key, and I am wondering if I need to invest in some adult diapers (joking) in case I have to cut it close again. So on that note..... gotta go!

oh btw... I think maybe I did in fact break my scale. I got on last night just to see... there is no way possible that I lost 15 pounds in 1 day, so I bought a new scale. I will weigh myself again and see what is going on. ;)